There’s a theme here! Welcome back to the blog here at intentionaljulie.com. If you’re new here I’m Julie, on my mid-life journey to living my best life. Last week, we kicked off this blog by embracing the beginner mindset and exploring new things. This week, we’re diving deeper into something that’s become somewhat of an obsession of mine, fine-tuning daily habits.
Habits become invisible. They’re repeated actions that quietly compound over time, shaping who we become and how we show up in life. This week with post #2, we’re not just listing “to-dos” – we’re examining our habits as the true foundation of intentional living. These daily non-negotiables aren’t arbitrary rules; they’re the consistent choices that either support or undermine our intentions. When we scrutinize them honestly, we uncover patterns that either empower us or hold us back.
What makes a habit a non-negotiable? It’s something you commit to doing every day (or nearly every day) because skipping it noticeably diminishes your energy, clarity, confidence, or presence. For me, these include starting with coffee, moving my body, nourishing myself, getting dressed and styled, and some self-care. I do keep many lists and track habits but the ones that occur ever single day are pretty much automatic, no check-list needed.
Drawing from Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg (which teaches starting ridiculously small, anchoring new behaviors to existing ones, and celebrating wins to rewire your brain) and Atomic Habits by James Clear (which emphasizes systems over goals, identity-based change, and the compounding power of 1% improvements), we’ll see how intentional habit examination leads to lasting transformation.
Why Examining Habits Is the Perfect Focus
After setting intentions, it’s natural to ask: How do my current habits support – or sabotage – those intentions? Life’s chaos (work, family, surprises, endless notifications) makes it easy to coast on autopilot. But autopilot often means defaulting to habits that eventually drain rather than fuel us.
The truth I’ve learned (sometimes painfully): Our results in life aren’t from big, dramatic moments – they’re from the quiet accumulation of daily habits. As James Clear puts it in Atomic Habits, we don’t rise to the level of our goals; we fall to the level of our systems. Examining habits reveals those systems.
Consistent healthy behaviors reduce stress, enhance mental clarity, and improve overall well-being. Even small habits like flossing link to broader health benefits (Mayo Clinic). In order to live our best lives, we have to get honest and ask ourselves: Which habits align with the person I intend to be? Which ones quietly erode my best self?
For me, this examination came after what I call my tipping point, not burnout but this aha moment – I was not thriving. Auditing my habits showed where I was leaking energy. Non-negotiables brought back vitality and joy.
My Daily Non-Negotiables: Habits Under Examination
Here are the five habits I’ve examined and made non-negotiable. They’re tailored to me, but the process of examining them can apply to anyone.
1. Coffee First: The Gentle Kickstart
I begin every day with a savored cup of coffee – brewed and enjoyed quietly. No rushing.
Examination: This isn’t just caffeine; it’s a ritual of self-kindness that sets a positive tone. Skipping it leaves me groggy and short-tempered. Science notes moderate coffee boosts mood and alertness. It’s a tiny anchor (à la Fogg) that starts the day intentionally.
Story: Trying to skip it for “healthier” options backfired – I love coffee. Not green tea, not mushroom coffee replacement…hot black coffee with zero cream or sugar.
2. Morning Movement: Energizing the Body
Movement soon after coffee – walking, running, and Peloton are my go-tos.
Examination: I used to think I. needed to run hard or go a certain distance in order for a workout to “count” but any movement makes me a better person. Mood, creativity, focus, all things are better when I make movement part of my mornings.
Tip: Scale tiny (Fogg-style) – start with 10 minutes. Start with a walk. Just start!
3. Nourishing Nutrition: Fueling with Intention
Whole-foods + water daily.
Examination: Junk food caused crashes and foggy decisions. Whole foods with few ingredients proved its power. Nutrient-dense eating supports immunity and clarity (Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition).
Tip: Prep ahead. Start with intentional swaps and get to know what feels right to your body. There is no “perfect” diet.
4. Getting Dressed and Styled: Signaling Readiness
Real clothes, hair done, perhaps accessories – even at home.
Examination: Working remotely transitioned into staying in workout clothes most days. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with workout clothes, but I had to make them intentional. This habit votes for poise and self-respect.
A powerful exploration of this comes from Episode #368 of The Life Coach School Podcast, “Why Style Matters with Judith Gaton” (listen here: https://www.thelifecoachschool.com/podcasts/the-life-coach-school-podcast-2/episodes/2148779780). Judith explains why style matters far beyond appearances – it’s about discovering personal style, navigating fit challenges with standard sizes, and using intentional dressing to show up as your confident, capable self. It’s a reminder that how we present ourselves shapes how we feel and act.
5. Oral Care Ritual: Honoring the Details
Flossing daily. Don’t laugh but I didn’t see the purpose of doing it daily and I know I wasn’t doing it “right” when I did do it (typically the day of my dentist appointment).
Examination: After many conversations with my dentist and dental hygienist and learning the tiny habit method I did start my daily flossing ritual and I haven’t skipped a day in years. I’m not proud of the fact that I was in my 40’s when I made this shift.
Tip: Find your favorite floss, keep it on your counter and just track it.
An evening wind-down supports sleep, but these five form the core foundation.
How to Examine and Build Your Own Habits
Honest reflection:
1. Audit: Track your habits. Note habits that energize vs. drain. Ask: Do these align with my intentions?
2. Select 3-5: Choose impactful ones (physical, emotional, presence).
3. Make Tiny & Anchor: Use Fogg’s method – shrink to easy (floss one tooth?), anchor to existing routines. I fill my water bottle right after I feed my doodle her breakfast.
4. Identity Focus: Frame as “I am someone who…” to shift self-view.
5. Track & Celebrate: Streaks motivate; celebrate tiny wins to rewire positively.
Adapt during challenges – examine along the way and don’t be hard on yourself!
In a hustle culture, this quiet examination is radical. Small, intentional habits build the life we intend – one examined day at a time.
Challenge: Examine one habit closely. What does it reveal? Share in the comments – let’s support each other’s foundations.
Until next time, stay intentional.
With love,
Julie
